In her remarks at the recently concluded Women\u2019s Mental Health and Gender Equity in Business Forum, Vanessa Zuba, a Gender Equity Advocate raised concerns about how everyone talks about \u2018Women Empowerment\u2019 and never \u2018Men Empowerment\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Her thesis was that empowered women have to deal with unempowered men, which affects women\u2019s overall well-being.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My friend Liv echoed the same sentiment days back, though from a marriage perspective. In her words, \u201cI hate how they make us do all sorts of things, especially to our bodies, all in the name of \u2018this will help you once you get married\u2019, but you never hear the same being told to boys,” She remarked angrily.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
To rule out the ideology, mostly from men, that women are overly emotional, thus whining a lot over nothing, I asked a few male friends to share the intensity of their pre-marital talks \u2013 that is if any are conducted anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At this point, I\u2019m guessing you can tell what the feedback is already. The majority of the men admitted light to no talks at all whatsoever.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When TikToker @Kingboiza posted an #fyp on TikTok for married men to share their greatest regret about marriage, thousands of comments, largely from men, flooded the post.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Even though they are more guidance tips than regrets, at SENS, we felt it fit to share the comments with our male audience \u2013 for they ought to be empowered. Not to mention, we are a mixed workplace and target a holistic audience. Dearest men, kindly take notes!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
DON’T CHEAT<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cShe may stay after you\u2019ve cheated, but she will never be the same ever again. Advice, DON\u2019T DO IT,\u201d read the first comment from Mavusana, with 115.4k likes and 895 replies. To reiterate this comment, Mzondii wrote: \u201cMy biggest regret in my marriage was to cheat and I am telling you, my wife was never the same, so my advice, never cheat, Never Ever.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n MAKE HER HAPPY, ALWAYS<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n For Ishmael Obare Guto, \u201cYour woman\u2019s blessings are of another level, so make her happy always.\u201d Reading this made me want to ask if he was single, but hey, I had to source out more marriage tips for my male readers. Let\u2019s move on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBe the partner you\u2019re looking for,\u201d commented Msindisi. The true definition of short and precise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n LOVE HER FOR MORE THAN HER BODY<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n When it comes to body shaming, no one does it better than men\u2013yet if we are being honest here, and tables were to turn, for men to dress in women’s outfits, hardly any would score 10\/10 on fashion police. But if I were the judge that day, I would give @kataPiller007 100%, primarily for understanding that: \u201cNot all women age gracefully with all their good looks and physique.\u201d Thus, advising men to, \u201cMarry her for more reasons beyond her body and beauty, seek a forever.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n NEVER A BAD WORD ABOUT HER<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Mr Fingerz\/Cybersecurity Guy on the other hand cautions bachelors to never speak bad about their spouse whether to their family or friends once they tie the knot.<\/p>\n\n\n\n As if he read Mr Fingers’ comment before writing his, Mokoney stated that \u201cYour wife becomes the words you speak to her,\u201d ending with an \u201cI regret not speaking life and good upon her.\u201d He must have been weeping while writing this. So, if you\u2019re a man out there, avoid repeating the same mistake. We would hate to see you cry!<\/p>\n\n\n\n LEAD HER PROPERLY<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n I’m not sure if he\u2019s a pastor or not, but from his comment, Mr Kay sounded like one: \u201cIf you lead your wife properly, she will submit naturally.\u201d Preacher or not, take the advice, thank us\/him later!<\/p>\n\n\n\n DON’T LOOK SOMEWHERE ELSE <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThe grass is never greener on the other side,\u201d said Rush Lee Lockhart. You may have heard this from people relocating abroad to chase the bag. It applies to marriage too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n DIVORCE IS WORTHLESS<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n An article published in September 2023 by The New Times indicated a rise in divorce rates in Rwanda from 21 in 2016 to 3,322 between 2022-2023. While we won\u2019t delve into the nitty grits behind this surge, Musa Njomane advises married men to opt for separations instead of divorces.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNot that I regret it, but divorce is worthless. Better separate, re-arrange yourselves and try again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n NOT BECAUSE OF MONEY<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Who would have imagined that money and marriage are two different things? Well at least not for men. For some women, your bank statement tops the list of \u2018qualities\u2019 we look for in a man. Surprisingly, for men too, although in a different way. @Thabang N418 has this to say in this regard.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cJust because you have money doesn’t mean you are ready to get married, it just means you are ready for a wedding.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I would have loved to bring all the comments to you, but I can\u2019t. However, the response from these comments on the original post already promises a lot. A reply from @Que Lindsey to the comments said, \u201cYou\u2019re all making me a better boyfriend, thank you, old guys.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I will sleep well with that.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In her remarks at the recently concluded Women\u2019s Mental Health and Gender Equity in Business Forum, Vanessa Zuba, a Gender Equity Advocate raised concerns about how everyone talks about \u2018Women Empowerment\u2019 and never \u2018Men Empowerment\u2019. Her thesis was that empowered women have to deal with unempowered men, which affects women\u2019s overall well-being. My friend Liv<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":7713,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[87],"tags":[106,107,95],"ppma_author":[120],"class_list":{"0":"post-7712","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-relationships","8":"tag-catch-feels-get-high","9":"tag-couch-potato-route","10":"tag-opinion"},"yoast_head":"\n